Where are you now, when I thought you were here
Only I wake to find, that you are no no where near
I cry at night, more and more the tears fall
To an empty pillow, to you I yell and call
It seems you do not hear my heart filled cry
So tonight I'll sit here writing to an empty sky
Pain killers don't work anymore, I need more
To show the smile and to hide the sore
My once beautiful soul is now stained with abuse
It stands in the rain for I have lost my muse
I can't see the way they do, can't they see
That I'm lost but I don't need them, just me
My head feels light as the pills kick in
Here I go again, losing it just to begin
By night I am free in a world of dream
When my eyes close, nothing is as it seems
Yet I know in the very back of my mind
Then when I wake the world isn't so kind
I can't get on my knees to talk to you
So I'm writing this for it's all I can do
My faith burned by wishes gone and dead
The stonecold heart has turned to lead
I've lost my gift, to write how I feel
It burned up, the pain was all too real
To stand there, watching yourself in flames
A life was lost in me, shall I forget the names?
Falling faster and spinning out of control
The pills, they seem just to patrol
Through the thoughts in my mind
And let me fast forward and even rewind
Past the days I started to fall, back to the ground
I feel drunk on pills, so pass me another round
The more you take, the longer that it lasts
And in this life you need a blast from the past
Lord, I'm crying for help, begging on my knees to you
Just don't leave me here alone with nothing to do
Where are you now, aren't you here?
In the morning I'll wake to find, that you are no where near
Jessica Helen Mortensen
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/my-cry-2/
